sum ergo sum

I woke early this morning after a full night of tossing and turning. Feeling sleepy I set up my Cuban coffee maker on the stove. While I waited I had a feeling to move my body so I listened.  My yoga mat was already laid out on the floor and I stepped on it. My body instinctively knew what to do. I reached my hands to the sky took in a deep breath then lowered my arms exhaling. This felt so good I continued moving this way over and over until the movements became rhythmic and my breathing synchronized. I moved from a place of intuition, pure allowing, and I was amazed at the strange shapes my body created, bending and twisting extending and contracting.  Every movement coincided with the breath. I noticed a part of my brain that wanted to judge the movement saying this is not proper yoga. Then a grater part of my self calmed the little voice and assured it that this is in fact the truest yoga around.   The literal  meaning  of the Sanskrit word...

Spirit support 11 months today, our beautiful Juliana left this world.    Its been a whirlwind of an experience.   I haven’t been posting in my blog as my attention was intensely focused on studying and passing my flight exam and check ride.  I’m happy to announce the instrument rating is now behind me as I passed with flying colors, literally.  The magnitude of the preparation has been all consuming. I didn’t know that I actually had the ability to study with such dedication. The flying practice itself was extremely challenging and many days I wanted to give up.  During the check ride, (after we had been already flying for over an hour,) I was feeling extreme doubt and exhaustion. My examiner was doing his best to cause a disorienting situation by changing my instruments. He placed sticky notes on three of the critical instruments then expected me to find my way with only use of a oscillating compass, all the time remaining on cou...

As most of you know my beautiful 19 yr old daughter passed away just a few months ago. She was in a tragic car accident and died,( according to coroner), immediately on impact. The last few month have been so challenging to navigate. I have been searching for comfort and understanding and made an appointment with a psychic medium. It took 6 weeks to talk with her and I am happy I did, here are some of the words that came through. enjoy. side note: the woman has an adorable Australian accent and some of her expressions didn't make sense but I wrote them anyway. Who’s lost a child? I hear some one say, “I’m her child.” have you got, one in heaven? -yes-   Your girl is well, yet she went tragically She also said you didn’t have time to say goodbye to her. - no- So she’s come in today to tell you all about everything ok.   There’s a birthday coming up? I hear happy birthday – she just had her birthday- You all were around for her birthday? She’s ...

Soul reboot~ Question?  When we die does it feel like waking up from a dream? Do we remember the details the love the people the story, or does it all disappear when our eyes open. Do we even have eyes to open? After the death of my daughter I have been doing everything I can to stay connected to her essence. I look for signs everywhere. I search my dreams, I search faces, pictures, animals, butterflies, the wind. Everything is now somehow connected to her. Its actually pretty wild how my mind can turn a song or conversation into something about my daughter and truthfully, it’s comforting. My youngest daughter and I decided to take a little time away and go on a trip together. We are working on completing Juliana’s extensive bucket list. Surfing and cliff diving are two things we get to check off after our fantastic stay In Puerto Rico. During our stay there were so many beautiful moments of clarity and understanding. Seeing the course of events unfolding and...

Inspiration~   Taking a break, hitting a serious reset button on my life. Taking time to evaluate and simplify and prioritize the people, the experiences, the importance of all of the things I focus on and give time and energy too. Sitting quietly on an island staring at the sea, waves, birds, sunshine, and sand. I breathe and feel my heart. I breathe and know everything will be ok. I breathe and tears roll down my cheeks and I feel gratitude to have a body that can feel the streaks of wet. I am so happy to be here now in the middle of the chaos of loss and grief and beauty, magic and inspiration. My entire world has been shaken, like a snow globe. The cool part is, I didn’t know that there were sparkles on the ground. I never even imagined that if it were shook hard enough that the most beautiful shimmering glitter diamonds would appear everywhere and my life would be surrounded by magic. My flat world has become alive, multidimensional, fluid. Every corner, eve...